Through this work, I pinpointed what parts of my anxious attachment are detrimental to my relationship. Sometimes it looks like pushing my partner away; other times it manifests in the form of me intentionally being mean as a way to manipulate my partner’s feelings.
I don’t plan to rid myself of my anxious attachment style. I try to be aware of it and work on relieving my anxieties for my own sake, but it’s more so managing who I am rather than trying to overhaul my personality. I know there’s nothing wrong with me or anyone who has an anxious attachment style.
But I do want to be a great partner. I want to grow with my boyfriend and not succumb to the notion “this is simply who I am.”
And perhaps what has worked for me will also work for you.